Children have often been an afterthought during the COVID-19 pandemic. They remain one of the last groups to be vaccinated and their education has been disrupted as they have had to learn from home, without any social interactions with their peers.

It is no wonder mental health concerns experienced by children and youth have surged during the lockdown. Data released by the Kids Helpline in August showed there was a 200% increase in children as young as the age of five contacting them for support in the first six months of 2021, when compared to last year.

Tracy Adams, chief executive of yourtown, the charity which operates the helpline, said mental health concerns were the main reason children contacted the Kids Helpline. This was followed by suicidal thoughts and behaviours and self-harm.

Experts are understandably concerned about the long-term effects the COVID-19 pandemic will have on children’s mental health. Though these issues may be complex, they said the solution doesn’t necessarily have to be complex either.

Here they have provided some simple tips for parents to help their children cope with the many stressors experienced during the pandemic.

Listen

Edwina Cowdery, the manager and senior psychologist at Logic Lounge Psychology Hornsby, said parents should use reflective listening to understand what their child may be thinking or feeling. She has suggested that parents should first have their child engaged in an activity, such as painting, before asking them questions.

“Don’t ask them questions on their own without doing something else. A lot of kids, if they’re doing something else, they’ll actually be less filtered,” she said.

Lower expectations

Jackie Schell, the clinical psychologist at Hornsby Kuringai Clinical Psychology, said many of the parents who present to her clinic are stressed and frustrated as they have to deal with the pressure of teaching their children while also working from home.

She recommended that parents lower their expectations about the amount of schoolwork their children should complete, and if they do have issues then they should discuss this with their teacher.

“Lower expectations about what you feel the child needs to get through for the day. Do a little bit,” Schell said.

Keep calm and carry on

But, above all else, Schell has strongly urged parents to remain calm at all times, even when their child may be having a tantrum.

“When kids lose the plot at home, you just want to reduce the intensity and frequency of those behaviours because often it’s just the kid feeling dysregulated, and they just can’t get on top of their emotion.

“We just want to minimise those times and have more positive interactions with our kids because essentially that’s what helps us have a great relationship with our kids and teenagers rather than having everyone yell at each other,” she said.

Schell said parents should forgive themselves if they get angry at their children or ‘lose the plot,’ and then remove themselves from the situation.

“Go and have a drink of water. Don’t say anything else. The kids might be screaming and carrying on but that’s okay. They’ll calm down if you stop,” she said.